T

he Greatest commandments according to Jesus were to Love God first and foremost with everything we have and secondly to love others as ourselves. (Matthew 22:38) I want to talk about the second commandment in this post.

The Golden Rule

The ‘Golden Rule’ seems to be a universal concept coming up in many religions and philosophies over various ages of civilization. “Do to others as you would like them to do to you”(Luke 6:31) Here’s another in a similar vein. “forgive us our debts, as we forgive others debts to us”.(Matthew 6:12)

Whatever You Sow will Grow

These concepts belong to the law of sowing and reaping. It’s not just ‘nice’ if we choose to listen to this wisdom, it is going to determine an outcome. Just as If I were to tell you that jumping off an 8-storey building would result in pain and death because of the law of gravity, I can assure you that neglecting these principles will result in pain, bitterness, and sorrow. The parable of the unforgiving servant in Matthew 18 shows Gods take on it.

Gods Plan is Good

It’s so wonderfully freeing to learn that God has a good plan for our lives and the person he sees us to be is the one he wants us to focus on. It’s so exciting when we choose to have the same sense of relief and delight at the possibilities that are there for the ‘others’ in our lives. Especially the ones who have not done well in our eyes.

Extending the Olive Branch

If we can accept the forgiveness of our sin toward a perfect God,( much of which we haven’t even been aware of), how much more do we need to be the ones initiating forgiveness to others who are imperfect, just like us?It’s interesting to observe birth families who unwittingly ‘hold’ members in the place of their unchanged judgments, often from their perception of the person from years, even decades ago. It’s unintentional unforgiveness maybe, but it still works out as negative faith in another, hindering relationship with God, the efficacy of prayer, relationship with the other, and creates a crop of self-righteousness in the one who judges. It’s ugly and it’s rarely seen by the heart that indulges in it.

Keeping Your Heart is No 1

Instead, we can follow the wisdom of Prov 4:23 which tells us that guarding our hearts needs to be our No1 priority because all we do flows from our internal integrity. Keeping a heart that refrains from judgment and unforgiveness is the bottom line in heart housekeeping and we need to be intentional to actually discern it. It’s so easy to justify a ‘true’ judgment of another or to get into agreement with someone’s offense toward another. It’s completely human and understandable but ‘illegal’ In God’s kingdom. If we want to be a Jesus follower, getting rid of such negative heart stuff is not an option, it’s a must.

What’s the Rub?

Matthew 6:15 declares succinctly the message constantly alluded to in the New Testament: if you don’t forgive, God won’t forgive you. It doesn’t matter how well we think we are doing or how successful or gifted we are. If we are not forgiving, then we are not Christian.

 

Apply it, Own it

Journal

Write down each member of your birth family or significant others. Describe them honestly as you see them. What judgements have you made?

Read

Romans 2:1-4

Consider

How can I align my perception of the ‘other’ with God’s character of kindness and patience.

Journal

What things to I need to forgive in my ‘others’? Hint: anything that still holds a pain or a sting, no matter how ‘over it’ you are, is likely to carry unforgiveness with it. Journal the things you forgive.

Prayer

Exchange your negative beliefs of others for ones full of kindness and patience. eg Instead of “She is so annoying.” how about something like “She is a constant reminder to me of my need to practice patience. She’s a Godsend.” Once again, new beliefs are a bit ‘uncomfy’ in their fit, but like old comfy shoes that do your feet no good, your old beliefs are doing your heart no good.

Forgiving people are forgiven and free.